Friday, April 11, 2008

Ali's Got Entirely TOO Much Time on Her Hands...


How to Make a Small Crossbow out of Household Items


from wikiHow - The How to Manual That You Can Edit

Right at the desk where you are reading this, you can probably build your very own mini crossbow. No knives, wood, electric appliances or any other expensive equipment are needed. All you need are some basic office supplies, ten minutes, and these instructions.

Steps


  1. Line up two of the pencils parallel to each other and secure them with tape, leaving at least a centimeter untaped at both ends in order to leave a space for the rubber band later. Repeat for the other two pencils.
  2. Create a cross that looks like a lowercase "t" with the two pairs of pencils. Secure them in that position with either tape (electric tape works best), rubber bands, or glue.
  3. Unscrew the tip of a cheap or useless pen. Unscrew the other side of the pen, and then take out all of the inner mechanisms. (Save the ink cartridge because that will be used as the ammo later.) After doing that, you should end up with a hollow tube.
  4. Secure the tube to the vertical side of the cross with tape.
  5. Stretch a rubber band horizontally across the crossbow, anchoring it between the two pencils and going over the pen in the middle.
  6. Wrap a piece of tape around the middle of the rubber band where it passes over the pen.
  7. Tie a rubber band between the pencils and the bottom of the hollow pen. This is to add elevation, which will come in handy later.
  8. Put the ink cartridge back into the tube so that it's sticking out slightly.
  9. Stretch the rubber-band to the end of the tube.
  10. Grab the ink cartridge, pull it back further with the rubber band, and let go.


Tips


  • Try experimenting with different types of bolts (the "arrows" used by your crossbow). Some bolts might work better than others, due to their size, shape or weight.
  • The bow isn't very good at long distance shooting, so if you want to pierce something, shoot it from very close up.
  • Use a bendable ruler for the base. It will give a little more flexibility, offering more power when the projectile is released.
  • Use a binder clip as a trigger.


Warnings


  • Do not aim this at people or animals, even as a joke. Accidentally letting go of the rubber band from something as simple as someone bumping into you might cause a serious injury.
  • If made poorly, the crossbow won't work well and will be hard to handle.
  • Do not look into the end of the crossbow while loaded. Use common sense.


Things You'll Need


  • 1 pen
  • 4 pencils
  • 2 rubber bands
  • Tape


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Thursday, April 10, 2008

Eat Spatula and DIE!

Ali, Blake, Billy, and DIERKS. Every last one of them. And the last wasn't even actually INVOLVED! Not really...

Ali and Blake are at it again, not that there's any surprise there. I swear, I wonder how those two have stayed married for so long. I guess they do really love each other, but I gotta be concerned sometimes. However, I do think that he just loves to drive her crazy. And she likes to make him pay for it.

And Billy, well, Billy just seems to get drug into whatever Blake's all wrapped up in.

All of this because I picked the wrong song to get caught singing. I started singing it, then Ali joined in. Blake overheard, freaked in his oh-so-charming (not) way and tattled to Billy. Why is Blake so damn scared of the Big D anyway? I'm lucky that Billy is quick to calm down otherwise I don't know what would have happened. I managed to convince him that Dierks wasn't anywhere near me, I was just singing one of his songs. Billy was relieved and apologized.

Blake? Well, judging by the look on my friend's face, he's not been nearly as understanding. I so love my man...

~Scarlett

Thursday, April 3, 2008

It Was Bound To Happen Eventually...

but why so soooooon? Yeah, I'm whining, deal with it!

I knew that once Billy got things back together that he'd be heading back out on the road again. But, back then, I wasn't pregnant and things weren't always going so good. Why does he have to leave now, right when I need him the most? When I want him the most?

He says he'll be home as often as he can; he refuses to stay out for months at a time this go 'round. I sure hope not. His son will be here in July and I can't do this without him. I guess there's only one way to ensure that he returns home as often as humanly possible. I'm going to have to give him that answer he's been waiting on.

Wish me luck.

~A nervous Red